How I Learned to Overcome the Fear of Writing
The fear of writing, or the fear to begin writing, it something every writer grapples with. I would even say writers grapple with this fear on a daily basis.
Sometimes, the fear is small and only whispers in one corner of the room. It likely won't distract you from actually writing anything. Some days the fear can be loud, annoying, menacing, staring you right in the face. It's a pesky thing, especially when you're trying to rework the same paragraph for the tenth time.
Throughout my novel-writing journey, I've also had to deal with facing, overcoming, and succumbing to fear. There were days when I was so scared to start writing that I didn't and I avoided it altogether. This would go on for days, weeks, months at a time until I finally got the courage to sit down and try again.
I don't want to pretend for a moment that you will get to a place where there is no fear of writing. I don't think that's realistic. Every area of life has difficulties. People of all careers have fears and hurdles to jump over every day. Think of athletes that have to deal with injuries, pain, and setbacks.
For me, that's where power lies. It's much better for your mental state to accept that writing won't necessarily get easier, the challenges will still be there, but you will become stronger and better able to manage them. As the Buddha said, "pain is inevitable but suffering is optional."
How to get over your fear of writing
When I was scared to start writing, what I discovered is that I was actually apprehensive about what to write. Apprehension turns out to be the biggest buzzkill. You're one foot in, one foot out. On one day, totally committed. And on the next, absolutely second-guessing yourself.
The truth is though, I never wanted to give up writing my novel. I'm too stubborn for that. I didn't actually want to quit, I just spent days, weeks, months rolling around feeling sorry for myself and wondering what was wrong with me.
Like many young writers, I just wanted everything to work. I wanted to have the energy every day to write. I wanted to feel like when I was writing, I was confident I was doing the right thing. And when it didn't, I was a hot mess.
I ended up avoiding writing for long swathes of time when I was studying at university. My story was still rolling through my head and my heart, but I just couldn't bring myself to write it down. Something about the act of writing when I felt so off felt sacrilegious. I felt like I would taint my story with my "bad vibes."
I overcome this setback of apprehension by writing. I know, crazy right?
I started to not care about doing it right. At that point in my life, I was absolutely addicted to doing everything "right." I needed some kind of approval to say, "your story will work, it's good, you should keep writing it." In the past, I was essentially trapping myself into failure. I stopped myself from even trying. I think to an extent this is why it took me a few years to see any progress. I was absolutely paranoid about putting a foot wrong.
When I think about this past me now, I see all the times I could have been working towards my novel. I see all the times that I could have been researching or figuring out the plot, or just giving myself permission to not have it perfect yet, but to at least start.
When I finished my first draft last year, it really made me think about my old perspective. My need to do everything right didn't help me finish my novel. In fact, I had to actively go against it to even make a dent in my first draft.
I started a new technique instead. To complete my first draft, every time I felt like I didn't know what to say, I simply wrote in blue what I wanted to happen. and then moved to the next scene. Like a machine, I powered through until I realized I was on the last paragraph of my last act.
Overcoming the fear of writing once and for all
Overcoming fear is never an easy task. Our bodies and minds want to run from it. We want to run far away to a place where fear and pain can never get to us. But in all the running and avoiding, we chew up the very time and energy we need to write.
Over the past few years, I learned that the fear of writing is nothing more than perfectionism. It's a sneaky beast that tries to worm its way into every sacred area of your mind. So like any beast, the only way to overcome it is to face it.
Facing your fear head-on can be daunting, but as I learned from Atomic Habits, it's really about chipping away little by little each day. I think one of the most powerful things you can do to overcome your fear is to work on it consistently.
Showing up each day means you don't have time to overthink or worry about it. I've tried to reduce my emotional attachment to my writing. If I enjoy it, great! If I find it hard, that's also fine. If I feel ambivalent towards it, then at least I did something that day. When you face your fear every day and do it regardless, you take away its power.
Surrendering to a daily practice really is key. Our ego and the mind try to spin us in circles with fear. Our mind becomes chaotic, not still and calm. Nothing can come from a chaotic mind. So much good can come from being consistent, which is why a writing routine helps so much.
By showing up each day, you will create a sustainable habit of writing that won't allow fear to wriggle in. At the end of the day, that's the best outcome that any writer could hope for.
